Ghost in the machine

Hello.

I remembered your birthday.

A hectic week and a tight schedule is not good excuse for this late wish. But the little time I have left from my overloaded pile of work, I used it to think of something special. Something that could send you my remaining warmth from this cold weather. Something that could earn a very handsome dimpled smile.

A blog post is not enough to write about the miraculous arrangement of fate, fate that could twist a lot of things around and make us friends. Words are not enough to make other people comprehend friendship this abstract but tangible at the same time. I always run out of words when I try to describe you, or me when I am with you, or us when we’re together. I guess this is one of those things that are better left unspoken, and better still, to just let it be.

I believe in this, K. I know that this is not a lie.

You are as important to me as I am to you.

I love you. Because I am only me when I am with you.
I love you. Because when I look at you, I want it so much for you to be happy, content, be filled with good things in life, to have your dreams come true. I want the best for you.
I love you. I love your sincere brown eyes, your reassuring shoulder, your infectious laughter, your convincing manner, even your fragile and weak speech when you’re down and low on the other side of the phone.

You cared for me, and took time to look into my petty life when you were having major shits, just because it matters to me. You made me belief in myself when I don’t, which happens very often. If I could only do as much or even more for you!

You know hallows? One of mine is in you. No matter where you go, no matter what happens, no matter how long it is until the next time I see you. If you hurt, I’m going to wince. I want the best for you, because I am sure it is the only way for me to be happy.

I miss you K. Happy birthday.